Romi: the bloody idiot!
Oma: hey, Romi…
Faiza: what’s biting you?
Romi: that sucker…that fool…that…
Yinka: hey relax! What happened? You are just coming in and you are sweating…what’s wrong?
Romi: gosh! I can’t believe I actually trusted that son of a bitch.
Yinka: what did he do?
Romi: I just caught him…only a few minutes ago, fucking his secretary!
Oma: holy shit!
Yinka: that’s so untidy.
Romi: tell me about it!
Oma: awww Romi, I’m so sorry to hear this.
Faiza: what could possibly have possessed him?
Yinka: his dick, maybe.
Faiza: Yinka! This is not the time for your sauciness o!
Yinka: come on! We all know men think with that long turgid instrument. They’ve got no other brains.
Romi: I agree! I swear if I had a knife, I would have cut that thing off!
Oma: you go girl!
Yinka: unless a man takes himself seriously, I don’t see why we should see them beyond what they are.
Faiza: Yinka, you are not helping matters this way. Romi is only going to get angrier.
Yinka: well, that’s the point you get to before you find meaning to the madness in the dating world.
Romi: I’m just so mad!
Oma: what exactly did you see, Romi?
Faiza: you want details, Oma? Like how long the ‘thing’ is? If the silly woman was screaming?
Oma: no nah, just facts.
Romi: he was moaning like a cow!
Oma: like a satisfied cow or a frustrated one?
Yinka: haha! And the most annoying part is you are not sure how long this must have been going on. Ah well, I did tell you there was something ‘not right’ about him the first time we met, didn’t I? He was staring lustfully at Oma.
Romi: really? None of you told me that.
Faiza: it wasn’t necessary; besides everyone stares at Oma and her lewd way of dressing.
Yinka: he looked too long; right down her cleavage, salivating.
Oma: no need to get madder, it was a long time… and nothing happened.
Faiza: oh Oma! Did you have to convince us of that?
Oma: ah! So that she doesn’t think…
Faiza: oh just shut up, Oma! Romi, what can we do to make this easier?
Yinka: burn his wardrobe maybe; along with all his splendid Italian suits.
Yinka: It’s therapeutic.
Faiza: ugh! You are so impossible!
Oma: what do you plan to do, Romi?
Romi: I don’t know.
Yinka: I’ve got a couple of solutions that just might help…
Oma: we are all ears!
Yinka: first, you need to go shopping…
Oma: I like the sound of that. Yay!
Yinka: get yourself some really sexy stuff…
Oma: you’ll be buying from me. I’ve got all you need in stock!
Yinka: also, you need to get to your apartment and get rid of everything that remotely reminds you of him.
Yinka: thirdly, do a bit of flirting with some hot guy in town…
Faiza: Yinka, that is very indecent…
Yinka: no commitments, just harmless flirting with Mr. gorgeous.
Yinka: lastly, remember that salsa lessons you wanted to start sometime back but never got around to? This is the time, girl.
Oma: wooooo! Way to go!
Romi: I don’t know…
Faiza: it’s not going to be easy dear, but I’m sure you’ll pull through.
Romi: thanks guys.
Yinka: you welcome, anytime.
Oma: one more question; um, was she on top of him? Was it doggy style? Froggie? Touch your toes?
Faiza: Oma oooo!!
Romi: she actually had his dick inside her mouth.
Yinka: now, that’s some hot loving.
Oma: hope you used to give him some of that too?
Romi: of course! I licked that fool like he was ice-cream!
Yinka: now, that makes it even worse.
Faiza: why, for the love of humanity, will I have a man’s penis inside my mouth?
Oma: ha! You mean you are not giving Oga some?
Faiza: God forbid! Does he ‘give me some’?
Yinka: jeez, you both are so boring.
Oma: hmm Faiza, are you sure he is not getting some…
Faiza: hey! Hold your mouth right there, Oma!
Yinka: essential question, Faiza.
Faiza: I have my ears closed; I don’t want to hear it.
Yinka: ok, suit yourself. Denial drives away insanity, after all!
Romi: his SUV is parked at my house.
Yinka: deflate all tyres.